Springbreakers (2012)

James Franco as a cornrowed gangster? Young women financing a spring break trip by committing armed robbery? Could it possibly be good?

It is not. It is, in fact, awful. Yet, I can’t discount it altogether.

We meet three party-loving collegiates, Candy (Vanessa Hudgens), Brit (Ashley Benson) and Cotty (Rachel Korine). I had difficulty telling the three—all blondes—apart early on. They stand around, engage in banal discussions and encourage their wholesome raven-haired friend Faith (Selena Gomez) to let loose.

They’re pumped to head to Florida for spring break but their bank accounts don’t match their enthusiasm. The downtrodden girls hang in the echoing dorm, abandoned by their peers. The blondes have a light-bulb moment. One borrows a professor’s car, they rob a restaurant and thus, finance spring break. You’d think that they’d return the car and be done with it. No, they torch and watch it burn.

They arrive in Florida and debauch with other spring breakers. All is going well until a party they are attending gets busted. They face several days in the clink when they are unexpectedly bailed out by Alien (James Franco), a rapper and drug dealer with an arsenal of weapons. He takes them back to a house party. The blondes are delighted. He takes a liking to Faith, who already uncomfortable in her surroundings, reaches her breaking point. She takes a bus home and that’s the last we see of her. (It’s so early in the movie, you wonder if Gomez decided that her brand could go only that far.)

Franco jumps into the role of Alien and is so over the top, you forget it’s him. The girls are smitten with the bad boy. Alien gets into his past and how he got to his heights of gangster-dom. His former best friend, Big Arch, also a gangster, warns Alien to stay out of his turf.

The movie rambles, meanders and takes a long time to get no where. We don’t find out what drives any of the characters besides basic hedonistic urges. It escalates to an unbelievable anti-climactic conclusion. Candy and Brit stay with Alien, cavorting and robbing. The lame dialogue, the annoying Hudgens and Benson and the empty plot plod along. It does possess elements perfect for cult-classic standing. It has stylized bits and cinematography that work really well. Pink ski masks, black light effects, slow-motion action and James Franco, especially James Franco, keep Springbreakers from being a zero. Alien deserves his own movie.

I can’t recommend Springbreakers to anyone who wants a plotted story with three-dimensional characters. It does have its moments, and under some conditions, like a midnight movie, bring it on.

Director: Harmony Korine

Country: US

Genre: Drama

Run time: 94 minutes

Scale: 3

Destinations: The Debate Surrounding the “Forever Marilyn” Statue (Chicago)

  Chicago is a tourist mecca. On a sunny summer day when the humidity index isn’t off the charts, it’s the perfect time for enjoying the waterfront and what it has to offer.

Among the newest sights on Chicago’s Magnificent Mile is the new aluminum and tin sculpture installation called “Forever Marilyn.” The 26-foot-tall piece replicates Monroe’s iconic pose in the billowing white dress over the NYC subway grate in The Seven Year Itch. Unveiled on July 15th, 2011, the 11-ton sculpture sits in Pioneer Court on Michigan Avenue where it meets the Chicago River. “Forever Marilyn” has had a polarizing effect on the city, drawing controversy for reasons, including:

1. Her panties are on full display. You can look up her skirt and some deem this view is in poor taste. (Blog author rebuttal: The cut on the panties is modest.)

2. Some question what message displaying an icon famous for her disastrous love life delivers to the public about women. (Blog author rebuttal: This piece is freestanding art. Can I not enjoy it at face value (no pun intended) as the image that I’ve seen referenced many times over the years?)

3. High-brows call it kitsch and not real art. (Blog author rebuttal: I happen to love it and on a separate note, what’s wrong with kitsch?)

4. They object to it’s misplacement nestled among the lovely stately architecture of the beloved Chicago landscape. (Blog author rebuttal: It only enhances the architecture around her.)

5. The sculpture has no Chicago connection. (Blog author rebuttal: The controversy has remedied that issue.)

I overhead several visitors remarking about how “neat, awesome” and “interesting” a piece it is. The members of the constant crowd of varied ages gathered around her with smiles plastered across their faces as they lined up to get pictures taken with Monroe’s likeness.

My question is, as the Chicago winter approaches, will the "City of Broad Shoulders" outfit the gal with a coat and/or knitted legwarmers to protect her from the harsh winds coming off the lakefront?

Destinations: Leavenworth, Washington

When Seattleites seek a getaway in the Pacific Northwest, places that come to mind are the San Juans; Vancouver, BC; and Portland, OR. For a quick jaunt (approximately 118 miles from Seattle), “Little Bavaria” or Leavenworth, WA, awaits.There you will find no shortage of sausages, German-inspired décor and lederhosen. On most weekends, some type of festival is happening so it makes sense to consult the Leavenworth Events Calendar when plotting your trip.

The local tourism bureau boasts that Washington is one of the fastest growing wine regions in the world, competing with places like Napa Valley. In light of this, start your adventure at one of the nine Leavenworth wineries and tasting rooms (travel to nearby Cashmere, Peshastin and Wenatchee for more).

At the Willow Crest-Pasek Cellars Tasting Room (939 Front Street, #B), you can savor upwards of 10-12 wines for $2. (If you buy a bottle, your $2 is applied toward the purchase.)

The tastings are energetic, staffed with entertaining wine connoisseurs providing palate-cleansing treats like chocolate-covered almonds and posh crackers.

Once done wining, it’s time to explore. You’ll encounter several indoor malls (oddly reminiscent of Wall Drug); fudge and pretzel shops; restaurants serving…you guessed it…bratwursts and burgers; drinking establishments; and gift shops stocked with nutcrackers, music boxes and tchotchkes—including dog-themed gifts, Leavenworth souvenirs, shot glasses, tiles—and hats. An interactive choice for kids and adults alike is The Hat Shop (719 Front St.):

After trying on hats, you will likely be hungry and thirsty. If it’s sunny, you may want to locate a place to bask and chow, where you can enjoy your friends and surround yourself with happy tourists. Once you discover the München Haus (709 Front St.), you are there—in a courtyard with wooden tables and benches with family-style seating. Beer and wine selections can be had at the outdoor bars. Sausages abound as do the 18+ mustards & sauces that complement the meat.

When you’ve had enough bratwurst (and cannot find the pulled pork sandwich you are craving for dinner and were told existed at a restaurant that only serves breakfast and lunch), you turn to the next best thing: Los Camperos Mexican Restaurant (200 8th St.). There, your crew will tell the friendly waitrons, clandestine-like, that it’s your birthday. They will make you wear the sombrero and take pictures, as the patrons laugh, happy not to be in that spotlight.

Once you are done exploring, you will want to check in at home base. The lodging choices are plentiful. The Adventure Inn (321 9th Street) is a good location (off the main drag) with a courtyard beer garden der Hinterhof with bands playing on Friday and Saturday nights, May through September. The headliners on this particular night—the funk-inspired Mugsy’s Grove—surrounded the birthday girl, still playing their instruments, honoring the day and being the impetus for the much-desired dance party. A memorable ending to an excellent day.